Where my followers at?

When I started this blog, I started it for family to keep up with my 1st pregnancy that live out of state. I never thought I'd WANT some stranger reading about my life with kids let alone see disgusting pictures of me (okay some maybe not so disgusting) until now. I have started to follow many blogs that I enjoy keeping up a 'virtual' relationship with and I look at my whopping 11 followers and wonder, 'what am I doing wrong?'. Am I talking about my kids too much? Blogging about our boring excursions? Maybe I need to step it up?

Let me just put myself out there..........I have 3 kids. TWO 2 1/2 year olds and a 2 month old. I stay in my pajamas most days and I'm lucky if I get to take a shower 2 or 3 times a week. And don't even ask if I leave the house (you're joking, right?)! If I do leave, it's to go to the park where I usually throw on 'mommy jeans' and put my hair in a ponytail. I look like crap but at least my kids look super cute. Isn't that the way it always is?

Here is what I look like right now:

Yup, no joke. I literally just got up, took a picture of myself and uploaded it! Don't you just LOVE my pajamas? (They are Victoria's Secret from 2 or 3 years ago in case you're wondering) I guess I have a thing for polka dots! Back to my post............I really was am fashionable. I read blogs like Chasing Twins  and think, why can't I be like Amanda EVERYDAY? Well, for 1, I work a full time AND part time job (at least for a little while longer) and the boys just DO.NOT.LISTEN these days. Ever since Kamdyn made her arrival, they flipped and do not listen what-so-ever. Ahhhh, terrible 2's. At least they are finally sleeping in their toddler beds (after much persuasion from my mom and hubby to switch to them from their cribs).



I do like to go out with the boys but WITH my husband or another adult to help round up these kids. When I do venture out myself, I have one kid going one way, the other one going the opposite way and a baby crying. That's when I want to break down and I think 'why did I have kids?'. But then you get those moments where they cuddle with you before bed and you have the baby sleeping on your chest and you think 'these are the moments I had kids for'. The moments where you are so in love with the life you made that you forget about all the naughty things they did that day or simply laugh them off (I could write a whole post or two just on what the boys have done since I've been on maternity leave).

But really, in a nut shell, this is me as a new Mommy for the 2nd time. I go back to work on the 27th and while I dread leaving my children and doing the whole 'working mom' thing, I am craving the adult interaction again. I don't plan on working my part time job for too much longer. I'm keeping my options open as to what I want to do about working full time. I'm to the point where I want to be with my kids but I want to work, too............when I sit down and really think about it, I think I want to stay with my kids MORE than I want adult interaction. We will see in the coming months how this will all unfold for me.

In the meantime, FOLLOW ME if you don't already and I promise I will be a little more exciting! :)

Early Morning Thoughts

*disclaimer - it is 2am and I am going on 2 hours of sleep so if this post sounds all 'woe is me' or 'selfish', that is not the way this is intended!

Miss K is now 6 weeks old! *sigh* I have been loving every minute with her and bonding with her like I never got to do with the boys when they were teeny, tiny. Having 2 colicky babies screaming at once, you don't really get that 'bonding time', especially when you have bad post partum!

What has been weighing on my mind, though, is that our family is complete, done, el fin! I am actually pretty sad knowing that I won't have any more babies. Knowing that my reproductive chapter in my life is coming to an end. My hubs only wanted 2 children and I wanted 4 or more. We compromised at 3 partly because we got the '2 for 1' deal the first time around and wanted to try for a girl. Miss K was 'made' sooner than we thought which means she was in our lives sooner than we planned but we don't love her any less. It just means that our life is pretty damn crazy right now with a newborn and 2 toddlers that are in their (really) terrible two's!

I am very happy I had all my kids young, that I was and will be able to still be active with them and young enough still when they are graduating high school and possibly entering college. I do feel that we are complete with Kamdyn but it still doesn't make me long for just one more.

I don't want to sound selfish. That isn't me..........while having 3 is proving to be quite difficult with the ages they are all at and I get VERY frustrated and complain, I still love all of them and just think having another to give all my love to would be a dream to me! Since that isn't going to happen, I am moving on, closing this chapter and focusing on raising my children the best I can. I am thankful that my husband gave me 3 precious lives to love and I love our little family so much I can hardly stand it!

Wordless Wednesday

A month already?

Between packing, moving and unpacking (oh, and having a baby!), this last month has flown by and has been so crazy! I finally had time to sit and breathe today and thought 'holy cow, my baby is a month old'. Time sure does fly and while we've been doing so much the last month, I have been enjoying my bonding time even if it is at 2am!

Kamdyn is just a gem! She is such a good baby and dare I say it, an angel! She surely has her moments but really, for the most part, she just cries when she is hungry or needs a diaper change. I guess after having 2 colicky babies, I needed the blessing and experience of what a 'normal' baby is like.

I feel so bad that I haven't taken many pictures of her like I did with the boys but I finally had some time yesterday. I plan to do monthly's again and then switch to every 6 months and then every year. We are due for another family picture as well. Hopefully I can get that done before going back to work. We'll see..............I don't even want to think about going back to work but it is bound to happen, unless I change my mind and decide to stay at home. Hmmm, we'll see!

Breastfeeding is going ok. I am happy I was able to keep my supply up longer than I did with the twins but at this point, I'm really just 'casually' doing it. I pump every now and then and really haven't been keeping my fluid intake up like I should. I am going to try to get my supply back up there to last a little longer. Hopefully it works! KK goes back to the doctor August 30th and I can't wait to see how much she weighs! She is already starting to fit into some 0-3 month clothes and is almost out of newborn diapers. I just can't believe she is getting so big already. It kind of makes me sad!

Here are some of the pictures I took yesterday of my peanut!



She is such a great subject to take pictures of. My next challenge is to get a 'good' picture of all 3 of the kids together. It's not so easy with two 2 1/2 year olds that don't sit still for 2 seconds! We will see what ideas I can come up with!!

Our Birth Story

Finally, after 2 weeks, I am getting around to updating this blog with Kamdyn's birth story. It's been very crazy here in our house with having a new baby in the house and packing to move in TWO days! Aye!
Anyways, everyone knew the last few weeks of my pregnancy that I was just completely done being pregnant. With the 100 degree heat and me measuring ahead, I was so completely uncomfortable that I just wanted her out!

June 30th, we had our rummage sale. For a few days before that I was starting to feeling a lot of downward pressure but never had any braxton hicks contractions at all.

July 1st, we decided since the day before didn't go so well that we weren't going to have the rummage sale again. We ended up playing at my parents house in the morning, came home and put the boys down for their nap. I took a nap as well and woke up with some lower back pain. I had all back contractions with the boys, albeit, not very strong or uncomfortable. With the boys they just felt like a dull lower back pain. This time though, they were strong and I felt them in my stomach, too.

I laid in bed for a good hour and then started calling friends asking questions since I never had 'real' labor or contractions with the boys. I started timing and I felt them every 5-8 minutes apart. I called my doctor and was told to drink water (which I have been doing) and rest (which I also have been doing). She apparently wasn't much help.

I waited another hour and at that point they were about 3-5 minutes apart. I was told if it was false labor that drinking water, rest and possibly walking would stop them so I decided to take a walk. Total bad idea..............I made it halfway around the block before I started to feel very light headed and nauseous. I managed to make it back home and was so hot that I stripped down and sat at the bottom of a cool shower. By this time I was in so much pain that I was screaming, etc. Basically all the fun things you see on t.v.

After about another 30 minutes, I felt a little gush and thought it was my water breaking (remember, I never went through this before with my 1st pregnancy). I told K to call my parents because we had to get to the hospital.

We arrived at about 7:30pm and when I was checked I was a whopping 1cm and 50% effaced. I was given a bag of fluid, pain meds and nausea medication (because I was puking all over myself. Fun times!).

My doctor finally came in at 9:30pm to check me again and I still had no change. My contractions were still off the charts and I was given the option to wait it out or go ahead with my c-section. Being 36 weeks, I felt kind of selfish wanting to just get it done because I worried that baby KK wouldn't be totally developed, etc. but I just knew since the pain meds and fluids didn't help my contractions one bit that I couldn't go on any longer in that much pain.

Kamdyn Kay was born at 11:47pm on July 1st and weighed 6lbs 15oz. She was just perfect! I felt this connection with her instantly. Maybe it was just that I had my baby girl or because she was happy and healthy. Either way, it was another great moment in my life!

The last 2 weeks home have been crazy. Kamdyn wasn't supposed to come until July 23rd since we are moving this weekend. She had other plans and that is fine. The boys have been ok with her. They are acting out a lot and being very naughty at home so we have really started to kick disciplining into high gear. They are doing good under the stressful circumstances. Just 2 more days and we'll be in our new house and getting settled will hopefully shut down the acting out a little bit.

We are just so happy to have our little girl home and enjoy her every minute we can. I will update as I have time. With 3 under 3, I am one busy woman at times but there IS always nap time! :)

Welcome to the world Kamdyn Kay!

My day on July 1st started out normal. Woke up, got the kids out of bed and planned out what to do that morning. A few days before, I started feeling a lot of pressure downward and wondered if it was KK starting to descend. I was feeling fine otherwise so I didn't think much of it. I was only 35 weeks and thought it was early. Apparently, she had other plans.........

That afternoon, I took a nap on the weekends like usual. I woke up with some lower back pain. About an hour later it started to get worse so I started to time when I would feel pain. It was about 5-8 minutes apart. I called the on call doctor when I started feeling it in my back and lower ab area and she said to drink water (which I had been doing) and take a walk. If that didn't help then I should go in. By the time I got up and refilled my water and got outside, I was feeling the contractions 3-5 minutes apart. I got almost around the block and started to feel really nauseous and light headed so I got home as fast as I could.

When I got upstairs, I was so hot so I stripped down and got in the cool shower. The pain got so bad so fast and I had Kevin call my parents to come over and said that we had to get to the hospital. It felt like forever for them to get to our house. I couldn't stand up because I was so light headed and felt like I was going to puke so I scooted my butt down the stairs and managed to get into the car.

Once we got to the hospital and I got into the bed, I started puking uncontrollably. I couldn't hold it in. I was checked and surprisingly I was only 1cm and 50% effaced. The doctor on call was in a surgery so I waited 2 hours for her to come check me again and I still had no change. I was given the option to wait it out or go ahead with my c-section which I had scheduled for July 23rd. My contractions were off the chart and I was in so much pain that I decided to go ahead with the c-section.

Kamdyn Kay came at 11:47pm on July 1st and weighed 6lbs 15oz. I was 36 weeks exactly!

We have been home for a few days and while it's been hard and chaotic (we are also in the midst of moving in 1 1/2 weeks), we are so happy she is here. We have had some bumps with the boys and having them act out but we are trying to work through it as best as we can.

Once I have more time, I will upload all of the gazillion pictures I have taken thus far! :)