My 1st week back.........

Let's just say, being away from work for 2 months, I was hoping things would have changed but they are still the same! It is nice to have that 'break' from the kids but I do miss them like crazy. I am surprised this transition is going better than it did after I went back to work after having the twins. Maybe because I'm an 'experienced' mom? Who knows?

Ain't it the truth that when you're with your kids 24/7, you can't wait to get away from them for 10 minutes and when you ARE away from them, you want to be with them? I know it's not just like that with kids, it's like that in life in general but my post is about them so we'll stick with that!

A quick recap of my week thus far: Monday morning, cappuccino, Tuesday morning, cappuccino, etc. I just have to say I'm SOOOOOO happy I can resume my coffee routine. When I was carrying KK, I was told by my doctor I could have a small cappuccino and not my normal large so I decided to not have it at all. Finally after 6 months of no coffee, I decided to have a small one and although it gave me some minor contractions, I continued to have it.

Now I can have my large cappuccino every morning and I.LOVE.IT!

That was really my week. This isn't an exciting post, nor did it have any structure. Just wanted to blog in between calls...........

Wordless Wednesday

Where my followers at?

When I started this blog, I started it for family to keep up with my 1st pregnancy that live out of state. I never thought I'd WANT some stranger reading about my life with kids let alone see disgusting pictures of me (okay some maybe not so disgusting) until now. I have started to follow many blogs that I enjoy keeping up a 'virtual' relationship with and I look at my whopping 11 followers and wonder, 'what am I doing wrong?'. Am I talking about my kids too much? Blogging about our boring excursions? Maybe I need to step it up?

Let me just put myself out there..........I have 3 kids. TWO 2 1/2 year olds and a 2 month old. I stay in my pajamas most days and I'm lucky if I get to take a shower 2 or 3 times a week. And don't even ask if I leave the house (you're joking, right?)! If I do leave, it's to go to the park where I usually throw on 'mommy jeans' and put my hair in a ponytail. I look like crap but at least my kids look super cute. Isn't that the way it always is?

Here is what I look like right now:

Yup, no joke. I literally just got up, took a picture of myself and uploaded it! Don't you just LOVE my pajamas? (They are Victoria's Secret from 2 or 3 years ago in case you're wondering) I guess I have a thing for polka dots! Back to my post............I really was am fashionable. I read blogs like Chasing Twins  and think, why can't I be like Amanda EVERYDAY? Well, for 1, I work a full time AND part time job (at least for a little while longer) and the boys just DO.NOT.LISTEN these days. Ever since Kamdyn made her arrival, they flipped and do not listen what-so-ever. Ahhhh, terrible 2's. At least they are finally sleeping in their toddler beds (after much persuasion from my mom and hubby to switch to them from their cribs).



I do like to go out with the boys but WITH my husband or another adult to help round up these kids. When I do venture out myself, I have one kid going one way, the other one going the opposite way and a baby crying. That's when I want to break down and I think 'why did I have kids?'. But then you get those moments where they cuddle with you before bed and you have the baby sleeping on your chest and you think 'these are the moments I had kids for'. The moments where you are so in love with the life you made that you forget about all the naughty things they did that day or simply laugh them off (I could write a whole post or two just on what the boys have done since I've been on maternity leave).

But really, in a nut shell, this is me as a new Mommy for the 2nd time. I go back to work on the 27th and while I dread leaving my children and doing the whole 'working mom' thing, I am craving the adult interaction again. I don't plan on working my part time job for too much longer. I'm keeping my options open as to what I want to do about working full time. I'm to the point where I want to be with my kids but I want to work, too............when I sit down and really think about it, I think I want to stay with my kids MORE than I want adult interaction. We will see in the coming months how this will all unfold for me.

In the meantime, FOLLOW ME if you don't already and I promise I will be a little more exciting! :)

Early Morning Thoughts

*disclaimer - it is 2am and I am going on 2 hours of sleep so if this post sounds all 'woe is me' or 'selfish', that is not the way this is intended!

Miss K is now 6 weeks old! *sigh* I have been loving every minute with her and bonding with her like I never got to do with the boys when they were teeny, tiny. Having 2 colicky babies screaming at once, you don't really get that 'bonding time', especially when you have bad post partum!

What has been weighing on my mind, though, is that our family is complete, done, el fin! I am actually pretty sad knowing that I won't have any more babies. Knowing that my reproductive chapter in my life is coming to an end. My hubs only wanted 2 children and I wanted 4 or more. We compromised at 3 partly because we got the '2 for 1' deal the first time around and wanted to try for a girl. Miss K was 'made' sooner than we thought which means she was in our lives sooner than we planned but we don't love her any less. It just means that our life is pretty damn crazy right now with a newborn and 2 toddlers that are in their (really) terrible two's!

I am very happy I had all my kids young, that I was and will be able to still be active with them and young enough still when they are graduating high school and possibly entering college. I do feel that we are complete with Kamdyn but it still doesn't make me long for just one more.

I don't want to sound selfish. That isn't me..........while having 3 is proving to be quite difficult with the ages they are all at and I get VERY frustrated and complain, I still love all of them and just think having another to give all my love to would be a dream to me! Since that isn't going to happen, I am moving on, closing this chapter and focusing on raising my children the best I can. I am thankful that my husband gave me 3 precious lives to love and I love our little family so much I can hardly stand it!

Wordless Wednesday

A month already?

Between packing, moving and unpacking (oh, and having a baby!), this last month has flown by and has been so crazy! I finally had time to sit and breathe today and thought 'holy cow, my baby is a month old'. Time sure does fly and while we've been doing so much the last month, I have been enjoying my bonding time even if it is at 2am!

Kamdyn is just a gem! She is such a good baby and dare I say it, an angel! She surely has her moments but really, for the most part, she just cries when she is hungry or needs a diaper change. I guess after having 2 colicky babies, I needed the blessing and experience of what a 'normal' baby is like.

I feel so bad that I haven't taken many pictures of her like I did with the boys but I finally had some time yesterday. I plan to do monthly's again and then switch to every 6 months and then every year. We are due for another family picture as well. Hopefully I can get that done before going back to work. We'll see..............I don't even want to think about going back to work but it is bound to happen, unless I change my mind and decide to stay at home. Hmmm, we'll see!

Breastfeeding is going ok. I am happy I was able to keep my supply up longer than I did with the twins but at this point, I'm really just 'casually' doing it. I pump every now and then and really haven't been keeping my fluid intake up like I should. I am going to try to get my supply back up there to last a little longer. Hopefully it works! KK goes back to the doctor August 30th and I can't wait to see how much she weighs! She is already starting to fit into some 0-3 month clothes and is almost out of newborn diapers. I just can't believe she is getting so big already. It kind of makes me sad!

Here are some of the pictures I took yesterday of my peanut!



She is such a great subject to take pictures of. My next challenge is to get a 'good' picture of all 3 of the kids together. It's not so easy with two 2 1/2 year olds that don't sit still for 2 seconds! We will see what ideas I can come up with!!